Right. So obviously I've let the blogging and the tweeting (and the housework and the shaving of ones legs) slip a little (a lot) lately...
Here goes...
I would like to say that I'm too busy with work or Elijah or one of the craft projects I have shoved in a bag/basket/box - but if I did, I'd be telling a big fat lie.
The truth is, I'm not that busy. I'm the usual mum-of-one-working-a-nine-to-five kind of busy. The truth is that when I do get a moment to sit down I sit on my arse and do nothing useful.
The truth is, I've been procrastinating about my life and pretty much everything in it for as long as I remember.
The truth is, I've had a pretty crappy life up until meeting my wife and I think it's finally caught up to me.
The truth is, I've finally admitted that being sad all the time even though I have a beautiful, amazing wife and an extraordinary son, is not ok.
I came off cymbalta (anti-anxiety medication) a few months ago and I've not really been ok since. It's been hard to get up, go to work, wash my hair...
I'm depressed.
I have anxiety.
*exhale*
I've said it. I feel like an attention seeking, self indulgent prat but I've said it.
I've seen my Dr, I've started seeing a psychologist and I'll get through it.
So. There are reasons I seem to have fallen off the face of the planet. But I'll be fine.
I hope that this post doesn't make me seem like a complete wanker. I hope you all understand, perhaps relate. I hope some of you even stick around ;)
Not attention-seeking or wanker-ish at all.
ReplyDeleteFrom experience, I think it can be really helpful to share this type of thing. I hope seeing a psychologist helps. Hang in there. It will get better.
It's good you are getting the help you need. That's a big step in itself. I hope you find yourself in a better space real soon.
ReplyDeleteI hope you find some relief. We were just talking last night about how anxious we've both been since the baby was born, and wondering if we should seek some help. It's a relief to hear we aren't alone!
ReplyDeleteI agree with Allison, not attention seeking at all! I've suffered depression for most of my life and have spent many years on anti-depressants and in therapy. Nothing works wonders for me, other than having a good yarn with my therapist. It really works. Hiding your feelings, ignoring them, pushing them away, will only build them up...so get it out, share and I promise you'll feel better and please never feel guilty! You have a human right to be happy and you're aloud to feel sad, it's learning how to manage it that is difficult, but so worth it if you can.
ReplyDeleteP.S. sorry for delay in commenting on this post. I've been a very busy bee!
Thanks everyone xo
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